Guarantee this is what I looked like to any passerby
So today I faced a challenge that was unlike any challenge I've ever faced. Let me set the scene for you, its a rainy day here in Barnstable, and not just that rain that you don't really mind because you can curl up and watch 8 episodes of your favorite TV show and not feel like a total scrub, but the cold slushy rain that is almost snow and you just want to kick it in the face. Anyways, I have a class at 2 pm and as always I stroll confidently out of my house a cool 10 minutes early because I live within 1 mile of the school and I absolutely HATE being the first kid in class. So I hop in my car and try to start it. It won't start. I immediately look at my lights and they've been on for a few hours now. Fuck. Battery is dead. 1:50:12
"Whatever, I'll just skip class today. NBD." Fuck. I have a test today. Fuck. And this professor is one of those professors that won't take any excuse. Even if you missed the test because you helped President Obama from an imminent alien attack, she'd be like, "still get a 0 on the test." Game time. I immediately start running down my road with backpack in tow looking like I'm running away from a murderer who just accidentally allowed me to escape. I WAS THAT FUCKING GUY. You know in the show "24" when the screen would go black except for what time it was on the screen? Well thats what I felt like was going on in my head. 1:53:49. I'm never going to make. Time to put it in high gear. Rain is pelting down on my face and I finally realize that if I was a girl, I probably wouldn't want to take it on the face either. Running down route 132 in my P.F. Flyers and some fucker has the audacity to fucking beep at me. Like he's just trying to let me know its raining and that I probably shouldn't be running in this weather. Thanks chief.
1:55:35 I finally get to campus but I still have to get all the way across to the other side to get where my class is. So I'm doing that awkward speed walk where it just looks like I took a dump in my pants and I'm just trying to get to the closest toilet. Three people just stared at me while I poop-walked by. Thanks for your concern, fuckers.
2:00:01 I walk into class soaking wet and everyone already has their test, but fuck it, because at least I got there. I sit down and the girl next to me asks "Why the fuck are you so out of breath". Well I just fucking ran from my house to get to a community college to take a test that I probably don't need to take because this class is so easy and now my brain is really evaluating my decision making processes and wondering why I don't own a bike or a scooter.
PS-Aced that fucking test
PPS- I really wrote this thinking that I'm a hero or something when in reality, I had to run like under a mile in 10 minutes. Not that awesome. Fuck.
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